{"product_id":"funny-absolutely-not-possum-valentines-meme-sweatshirt","title":"Possum Valentines Sweatshirt","description":"\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"6\"\u003e🐀❤️ \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"5\"\u003eLove is in the air? Absolutely Not.\u003c\/b\u003e If your ideal Valentine’s Day involves playing dead and avoiding social interaction, we have the perfect fit. Our \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"155\"\u003e\"Absolutely Not\" Possum Valentines Sweatshirt\u003c\/b\u003e combines the sweetness of vintage holiday aesthetics with the raw, unbothered energy of everyone's favorite trash-cat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7\"\u003eFeaturing a screaming (but cute) opossum framed by a kitschy retro heart, this sweater is the ultimate mood for the \"Anti-Valentine\" crowd. It’s for the folks who prefer snacks over romance and screaming at the moon over candlelight dinners. Wear it to a Galentine’s party, a solo movie night, or whenever you need a soft, fleecy barrier between you and the world's expectations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-path-to-node=\"8\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"9\"\u003e🧵 Key Features:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10\"\u003e✨ \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10\" data-index-in-node=\"2\"\u003eKitschy \"Trash-Romantic\" Graphic\u003c\/b\u003e Features a high-definition print of an opossum with a \"Cottagecore-meets-Chaos\" heart border. The design uses a distressed, vintage-wash effect to give it that authentic 90s thrift store find look.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"11\"\u003e☁️ \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"11\" data-index-in-node=\"3\"\u003e\"Soft-as-a-Possum's-Belly\" Fleece\u003c\/b\u003e Made from a premium 8.0 oz cotton-poly blend. The interior is air-jet spun for a soft feel and reduced pilling—because unlike a real opossum, this sweatshirt stays smooth and cozy wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"12\"\u003e🧍♂️ \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"12\" data-index-in-node=\"6\"\u003eUnisex \"Hissing \u0026amp; Huggable\" Fit – Sizes S to 5XL\u003c\/b\u003e A classic, boxy crewneck silhouette that is perfect for layering. It offers enough room to hide in when someone asks about your relationship status.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"13\"\u003e🧶 \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"13\" data-index-in-node=\"3\"\u003eHigh-End Construction\u003c\/b\u003e Includes double-needle stitching at the shoulder, armhole, neck, waistband, and cuffs. The 1x1 ribbed collar with spandex ensures the neckline stays crisp, even if your life is a mess.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"14\"\u003e🎨 \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"14\" data-index-in-node=\"3\"\u003eVintage Holiday Palette\u003c\/b\u003e Available in \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"14\" data-index-in-node=\"40\"\u003eSand, Light Pink, Ash Grey, and Forest Green\u003c\/b\u003e—colors that make the vibrant pink heart and the screaming opossum truly \"pop.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-path-to-node=\"15\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"16\"\u003e✅ Why It’s the Perfect Gift:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"17\"\u003eBecause standard Valentine's gifts are boring. This is the \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"17\" data-index-in-node=\"59\"\u003ebest gift for Possum Lovers\u003c\/b\u003e, meme connoisseurs, and that one friend who identifies a little too closely with nocturnal scavengers. It’s weird, it’s specific, and it’s undeniably cozy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-path-to-node=\"18\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"19\"\u003e✅ Embrace the Chaos:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"20\"\u003eSet your boundaries in style this February. \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"20\" data-index-in-node=\"44\"\u003eAdd the \"Absolutely Not\" Possum Sweatshirt to your cart today!\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dog Mom Hat","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":49289807036653,"sku":null,"price":33.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":49289807069421,"sku":null,"price":33.75,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":49289807102189,"sku":null,"price":34.2,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":49289807134957,"sku":null,"price":34.65,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 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