"Absolutely Not But I'm Funny" T-Shirt
"Absolutely Not But I'm Funny" T-Shirt
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Very responsive and super helpful in creating the perfect design for the embroidery. My lover absolutely adored it. The couple customization is brilliant and is such o thoughtful gift idea, as well! Love it!
Lexie Gilmore
★★★★★The sweatshirt and embroidery is wonderful! I ordered this as a gift for my girlfriend and she loves it! The quality is so good and the embroidery was exactly as the reference picture! It also came super quickly and turned out very nicely!
Natasha Kotal
★★★★★Great item for couple! The sweater is so soft inside and the embroidery is exactly what I requested. The Couplematching support was quick and helpful when I had a question about the item, and catered to my needs as I had specific, would definitely recommend to others!
Lynelly Blackett
★★★★★
Size Guide
Product measurements
(*) Please note that there might be a ±1.0 inches difference due to manual measurement and production processes.
Chest: Measured across the chest one inch below armhole when laid flat
Body Length: Measured from high point of shoulder from the back
Sleeve Length: Start at center of neck and measure down shoulder, down sleeve to hem.
Size guide text
🎭✨ The Honest Answer Nobody Actually Wants. We’ve all been there: someone asks "How are you?" and you have to decide between a trauma dump or a joke. Our "Are You Okay? Absolutely Not But I'm Funny" T-Shirt makes the choice for you. It’s the official uniform for the overthinkers, the chronically stressed, and the delightfully unhinged who keep the vibes high even when the bar is low.
Featuring clean, bold typography that aligns with the "Aesthetic Sarcasm" trend, this tee is designed for those who use humor as a primary personality trait. Whether you're running on iced coffee and sheer willpower or just trying to survive a Tuesday, this shirt tells the truth so you don't have to.
🧵 Key Features:
💬 Bold "Deadpan" Typography Features a high-contrast, minimalist font design. The print uses eco-friendly, soft-touch inks that won't crack or peel, ensuring your sarcasm stays crisp wash after wash.
☁️ Super-Soft "Security Blanket" Cotton Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton. This lightweight, premium fabric is breathable and smooth, providing the physical comfort you need while you're being "emotionally brave."
🧍♀️ Unisex "Relaxed But Refined" Fit – Sizes S to 4XL Designed with a tailored-yet-comfy silhouette. It features side-seam construction to prevent that boxy "cheap tee" look, ensuring it flatters every body type.
🧶 Quality-Tested Durability Includes shoulder-to-shoulder taping and a retail-quality ribbed collar. This shirt maintains its shape and fit, no matter how many times you wear it to "mask" your true feelings.
🎨 Aesthetic Neutral Palette Available in Vintage Black, Classic White, Sage Green, and Storm Grey—versatile colors that pair perfectly with an oversized cardigan or a "I'm staying in" pair of joggers.
✅ Why You’ll Love It:
Because life is a lot, but your outfit shouldn't be. This tee offers a witty, trendy way to navigate the chaos of 2026. It’s the perfect Casual Gift for Her—whether "her" is your best friend, your sister, or your own chaotic self.
✅ Speak Your Truth:
You don’t have to be "okay" to be iconic. Add the "Absolutely Not" Sarcastic Tee to your cart today and let the laughs carry you through.
🎭✨ The Honest Answer Nobody Actually Wants. We’ve all been there: someone asks "How are you?" and you have to decide between a trauma dump or a joke. Our "Are You Okay? Absolutely Not But I'm Funny" T-Shirt makes the choice for you. It’s the official uniform for the overthinkers, the chronically stressed, and the delightfully unhinged who keep the vibes high even when the bar is low.
Featuring clean, bold typography that aligns with the "Aesthetic Sarcasm" trend, this tee is designed for those who use humor as a primary personality trait. Whether you're running on iced coffee and sheer willpower or just trying to survive a Tuesday, this shirt tells the truth so you don't have to.
🧵 Key Features:
💬 Bold "Deadpan" Typography Features a high-contrast, minimalist font design. The print uses eco-friendly, soft-touch inks that won't crack or peel, ensuring your sarcasm stays crisp wash after wash.
☁️ Super-Soft "Security Blanket" Cotton Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton. This lightweight, premium fabric is breathable and smooth, providing the physical comfort you need while you're being "emotionally brave."
🧍♀️ Unisex "Relaxed But Refined" Fit – Sizes S to 4XL Designed with a tailored-yet-comfy silhouette. It features side-seam construction to prevent that boxy "cheap tee" look, ensuring it flatters every body type.
🧶 Quality-Tested Durability Includes shoulder-to-shoulder taping and a retail-quality ribbed collar. This shirt maintains its shape and fit, no matter how many times you wear it to "mask" your true feelings.
🎨 Aesthetic Neutral Palette Available in Vintage Black, Classic White, Sage Green, and Storm Grey—versatile colors that pair perfectly with an oversized cardigan or a "I'm staying in" pair of joggers.
✅ Why You’ll Love It:
Because life is a lot, but your outfit shouldn't be. This tee offers a witty, trendy way to navigate the chaos of 2026. It’s the perfect Casual Gift for Her—whether "her" is your best friend, your sister, or your own chaotic self.
✅ Speak Your Truth:
You don’t have to be "okay" to be iconic. Add the "Absolutely Not" Sarcastic Tee to your cart today and let the laughs carry you through.
Thank you for shopping with DogMomHat.
This Shipping Policy explains how orders are processed, produced, and delivered to customers in the United States and internationally.
Order Processing & Production Time
All orders are typically processed within 24 hours after payment confirmation.
Each product is made to order. The standard production time is 1–5 business days. During peak seasons or promotional periods, production may take slightly longer. If there is an unusual delay, we will notify you by email.
Domestic Shipping (United States)
Delivery Time & Shipping Costs
Shipping costs are calculated and displayed at checkout before payment is completed.
Shipping MethodEstimated Delivery TimeCostStandard Shipping1–15 business daysFree for orders over $79
Delivery times are estimates and may vary due to carrier delays, weather conditions, or other external factors.
Shipping Destinations
DogMomHat ships to:
All U.S. states
U.S. territories
APO / FPO / DPO addresses
Please ensure your shipping address is accurate. We are not responsible for delays caused by incorrect or incomplete address information.
Shipment Confirmation & Tracking
Once your order ships, you will receive a shipping confirmation email with a tracking number.
Tracking information usually becomes active within 24 hours after shipment.
Customs, Duties & Taxes
For international orders, customers are responsible for any customs fees, import duties, or taxes imposed by their local authorities. These charges are not included in the product price or shipping cost.
Shipping Issues & Damaged Packages
DogMomHat is not responsible for packages that are lost or damaged by the shipping carrier.
However, if your order arrives damaged, please contact us promptly so we can assist you with a resolution.
Please keep all original packaging and damaged items when reporting an issue.
International Shipping
Shipping MethodEstimated Delivery TimeCostStandard International2–20 business daysCalculated at checkout
International delivery times may vary depending on destination and customs processing.
Returns
For information about returns and refunds, please refer to our Return & Refund Policy, which outlines eligibility, timelines, and procedures.
Thank you for shopping with DogMomHat.
This Shipping Policy explains how orders are processed, produced, and delivered to customers in the United States and internationally.
Order Processing & Production Time
All orders are typically processed within 24 hours after payment confirmation.
Each product is made to order. The standard production time is 1–5 business days. During peak seasons or promotional periods, production may take slightly longer. If there is an unusual delay, we will notify you by email.
Domestic Shipping (United States)
Delivery Time & Shipping Costs
Shipping costs are calculated and displayed at checkout before payment is completed.
Shipping MethodEstimated Delivery TimeCostStandard Shipping1–15 business daysFree for orders over $79
Delivery times are estimates and may vary due to carrier delays, weather conditions, or other external factors.
Shipping Destinations
DogMomHat ships to:
All U.S. states
U.S. territories
APO / FPO / DPO addresses
Please ensure your shipping address is accurate. We are not responsible for delays caused by incorrect or incomplete address information.
Shipment Confirmation & Tracking
Once your order ships, you will receive a shipping confirmation email with a tracking number.
Tracking information usually becomes active within 24 hours after shipment.
Customs, Duties & Taxes
For international orders, customers are responsible for any customs fees, import duties, or taxes imposed by their local authorities. These charges are not included in the product price or shipping cost.
Shipping Issues & Damaged Packages
DogMomHat is not responsible for packages that are lost or damaged by the shipping carrier.
However, if your order arrives damaged, please contact us promptly so we can assist you with a resolution.
Please keep all original packaging and damaged items when reporting an issue.
International Shipping
Shipping MethodEstimated Delivery TimeCostStandard International2–20 business daysCalculated at checkout
International delivery times may vary depending on destination and customs processing.
Returns
For information about returns and refunds, please refer to our Return & Refund Policy, which outlines eligibility, timelines, and procedures.
Q: How do I know what my design will look like?
A:We will send you the design and wait for your approval before processing your order.
Q: Can I change a new photo?
A:Yes, you can. Please contact us about the changes before we making the design (within 12 hours)
Q: Is it free of charge when I want to change another design?
A:You will be charge $5-$15 (depend on how complicated of the design) per design as we will start a new one from scratch.
Q: Can I see the design before purchasing?
A: Because of handmade product, we are not able to show the design before placing the order. We offer unlimitted revisions and only make embroidery once it's approved. We make sure you are 100% satisfied with the final.
Q: We don't have photo together, can you help us?
A: Yes, we can! We can make a combination for you.
Q: Where is my package?
A: When the product is shipped, an email with tracking number (as well as the link) is sent to your email address. You can track the package by using tracking number from there.
Q: Can I upgrade my shipping?
A: Yes, you can. Please contact us via our email or number as soon as possible when you want to change shipping method.
Q: What size do you offer?
We offer sizes up to 5XL for sweatshirts, hoodies, and T-shirts. They are unisex and fit true to size. For sizes above 3XL, please contact us as there may be a slight price variation.
Q: My photo will be posted on your website?
A: No, we are sure that when we don't have your permission, your photo will be not leak
Q: How do I know what my design will look like?
A:We will send you the design and wait for your approval before processing your order.
Q: Can I change a new photo?
A:Yes, you can. Please contact us about the changes before we making the design (within 12 hours)
Q: Is it free of charge when I want to change another design?
A:You will be charge $5-$15 (depend on how complicated of the design) per design as we will start a new one from scratch.
Q: Can I see the design before purchasing?
A: Because of handmade product, we are not able to show the design before placing the order. We offer unlimitted revisions and only make embroidery once it's approved. We make sure you are 100% satisfied with the final.
Q: We don't have photo together, can you help us?
A: Yes, we can! We can make a combination for you.
Q: Where is my package?
A: When the product is shipped, an email with tracking number (as well as the link) is sent to your email address. You can track the package by using tracking number from there.
Q: Can I upgrade my shipping?
A: Yes, you can. Please contact us via our email or number as soon as possible when you want to change shipping method.
Q: What size do you offer?
We offer sizes up to 5XL for sweatshirts, hoodies, and T-shirts. They are unisex and fit true to size. For sizes above 3XL, please contact us as there may be a slight price variation.
Q: My photo will be posted on your website?
A: No, we are sure that when we don't have your permission, your photo will be not leak
